Volatile

Volatile. That’s the word I’m looking for!

vol·a·tile (vl-tl, -tl)
adj.
1. Chemistry
a. Evaporating readily at normal temperatures and pressures.
b. That can be readily vaporized.
2.
a. Tending to vary often or widely, as in price: the ups and downs of volatile stocks.
b. Inconstant; fickle: a flirt’s volatile affections.
c. Lighthearted; flighty: in a volatile mood.
d. Ephemeral; fleeting.
3. Tending to violence; explosive: a volatile situation with troops and rioters eager for a confrontation.
4. Flying or capable of flying; volant.

Volatility defined by Wikipedia: A measure of instability.

Pfft. You people.

Fatigue Sets In (11)

The past few days went by pretty fast. The few days before last weekend were spent preparing for our test weekend with friends as guests. The weekend, well the weekend happened, it went smoothly but that’s not to say it didn’t take any effort or energy. And the only thing that welcomes me back from work at the resort is school. Bah.

Tomorrow morning I go to Bulacan to finalize the landscaping for the resort. In the afternoon, yes, I have to go to school, but I’m thinking of skipping that in favor of talking to my would-be-manager to finalize rates and packages. In the evening I have another meeting with Vincy to talk about more rates and packages for the people he’ll be bringing in to the resort. The following days I’d have to rush the tiles to prepare the kitchen for installation next Monday. While I’m doing that, I also have to follow up on the granite sinks so we can have at least a few complete rooms this weekend, we’re expecting some important guests to stay with us over the weekend.

Not to give the wrong idea, I enjoy the business, I enjoy running around. But more importantly than getting physically tired is being emotionally drained. I’m sure most if not everyone’s felt that at one time or another. Anyway, I’m in need of something familiar. It’s not helping that the people I’m always with are just so shifty right now that I don’t know where to place myself. Much stress. Anyway, yeah. In need of something familiar, something comfortable. The sad part is right now I don’t know where to look for that (well, I may know where but let’s not go to keso-nation). I just want to be able to relax and be with people I’m comfortable with without having to worry about anything, even for a couple of hours. Oh well.

Test Weekend (Day 10)

I just got back from Batangas, where we did our first test run weekend. Dive packages offered were PhP2000 for a daytrip inclusive of 3 dives (boat fare, tanks, dive pass) and 2 meals, and PhP3700 for overnight stay inclusive of 5 dives (boat fare, tanks, dive pass) and 4 meals. So far so good I’m happy to say that the current staff was able to handle the group (14 on the first day and 8 on the 2nd day) very well. Still a long way to go in terms of food, service, rooms and overall landscaping but I’m pretty much happy with that’s been done so far.

So anyway, I just got back. It’s 11PM, I have a test tomorrow at 8AM (which I will no longer study for), and I’m dead tired. I have to say that it really was nice to see things running at the resort. After 7 long months, I finally get to sit back, take in everything that’s happening and think to myself ‘hey, its a resort!’ LOL. But yeah, like I said, there’s still a long way to go. Hopefully I’d be able to finish the landscaping by next week, along with all the bathroom fixtures so we can actually accept overnight guests (guests who aren’t my friends). I want to get this up and running as soon as possible, for the first time I really feel that time’s a-wasting. I’ve been trying to rush everything for the past two weeks, constantly bugging my designer and foreman for all the details. Sometimes I wish I really didn’t go to school this semester so I could really give my full attention to the resort. Four days out of the seven days that I should be at the resort is wasted in class. Well not really wasted, but I just feel that the resort is more important at this point in time. Meh.

Anyway, will finish this update another time because I’m just about ready to pass out on my bed. LOL.

Day 7

It would have slipped my mind had it not been for the note she left on my iCal. Today marks our first month together. LOL. Man. A year’s going to be so long…

Working right now, but will update soon, many developments, especially with the resort. Need to also upload new pictures at the Acacia Blog and get the permits and everything running. Opening very soon! Watch out for it!

Day 4

Its the fourth day and I feel that time’s just gone by so quickly. I told this to my friend Rish, and she tells me ‘sa simula lang mabilis‘. LOL.

So, well, today wasn’t so bad, except that it was raining both times I went to school. Apart from that, it was pretty much a normal day I guess.

On an even more random note, some people can be so hurtful. Maybe its just me, but it always bothers me how people can forget so easily. Its exhausting to keep up with people like this, and I often find myself asking why I even bother. Moving on isn’t hard, its wasting what could be there, or maybe already is, that’s depressing. Oh well. Life goes on.

Day One

It has been exactly one month since my last post on this blog. A lot can happen in one month. For those who don’t already know, I have a girlfriend now. LOL. And if you don’t already know that, then you probably also don’t know that she left this morning for the Netherlands for work… for a year.

So there. I just got back from Anilao now and thought of posting this. Earlier this morning I was looking for a count-up timer (reverse of a countdown timer of course), to mark the days since she left. Sadly, I don’t think there are any available on the net, and even if they were, they wouldn’t really work so well since the counter would reset whenever I turned the computer off or restarted it. And yes, I’m too lazy to actually do that manually so, never mind.

I wouldn’t really call my day rough, but, well, maybe the fatigue from the last two weeks without proper sleep in setting in, and that’s probably making me just a wee bit emotional. I actually found myself (in between talking to people and fussing over construction) counting the number of hours that had gone since Cat’s plane took off, and the number of hours remaining til her plane would land. It is now 8:42 in the evening, and she’s still got about 5 hours til she gets to Amsterdam. It’s a little surprising because I honestly didn’t think I’d be that bothered by it. But yeah, maybe going to Anilao reminded me of what I won’t have around for the next 12 weeks or so. 12 weeks isn’t that long if you think about it, but then I guess its kind of sad to have to let go and wait some more for something I’ve been waiting for since God knows when. But all good, I figured that its a good way to actually solidify this… relationship (it feels weird to use that word now), by being apart like this. This way, we really need to focus and pay attention to this, rather than just settling and being swept away as most new couples tend to get. New couples. Right. LOL. Well, bottomline for now is it’s been 12 hours since I last saw her and I miss her already (how keso).

So this is a kind of vague entry, I shall explain more later or tomorrow or when I find time or if I find internet at Anilao (I’m going back later at midnight rather than tomorrow morning).

Cat, hope you clicked the link to this and are reading this. LOL. Leave a message or something, I’ll try to get online or whatever as soon as I can. Take care!

Knowing My Place

Its been a while again since I’ve had time to sit down and write my head out. In the past 2-3 weeks, I’ve gone on a roadtrip to Ilocos, went to Coron, Palawan again to dive the Japanese wrecks, flew to Bangkok with Char and the twins (first time to be out of the country with just friends), and finally, had a 4 day weekend at the resort with some friends and the checkout group. I got to spend a lot of time with a lot of my friends while ending this summer, and yeah, I did have a great time.

Anyway, spending so much time with so many people raises a lot of questions for me on where I’m supposed to put myself in the scheme of things. Issues like should I be hanging out with these people or should I share this much of myself to someone or how am I supposed to be acting around certain people keep itching on at the back of my head. Funnily enough, just now a friend of mine raised these same issues. It’s rather disturbing and disconcerting that you have to be wary of how you act and what you say around people who are supposed to be your friends. It causes much stress.

Some people really just have to make such a big deal out of everything. I don’t understand that. And to some point, I don’t really want to understand or bother anymore. I know its not my place to say how one should or should not act, but sometimes when it starts to affect me and the people around me, well, its not nice. It really worries me how I’m supposed to act around people nowadays. It feels like every movement is a big deal, every word causes an issue and every look means something else.

I hope some people think and realize the harm and damage they’re causing by acting the way they do, by talking about the things they do, and by treating some people the way they do. Friendship and trust is rare these days, don’t risk losing it by doing something you don’t really need to be doing in the first place.

Hello, rain.

I woke up late this morning. Well, not really… I woke up at 5:30AM, but went right back to sleep. The plan was to leave the house by around 6AM to beat the car’s coding day that starts at 7AM. So much for that. I woke up again at around 9:30AM, then decided to crash the coding window, though I must add that there really isn’t a window for coding here in San Juan so I did kind of risk it… to some extent. Anyway, Migs and Rish went with me today, they were both just bored and wanted to get out of Manila.

The trip going was pretty uneventful, very relaxed actually. Driving in the rain with Goldfrapp on the radio… Strangely enough, it felt like winter. Except that we were wearing slippers, shorts and sandos and going to the sea. But yeah anyway, it was extra cold in the car cause of the rain. I don’t think we saw even a spot of sunshine the entire day. So yeah, it was raining. When we got to Anilao it was also raining. Raining from Manila to Anilao. I was even faked into thinking the water was calm. I realized as soon as I got off the car at the resort how wrong I was when I heard the waves just thundering onto the shore. It rained, stopped, rained again, stopped, rained some more. Summer’s over.

I started the resort project in the rain actually. I remember sleeping in the room with my blanket over me even without airconditioning because the rain just made it so cold. And a few months later it got hotter and hotter during the evenings until I finally gave in and installed a temporary airconditioning unit in the room. And today it was cold again. So much time gone by so quickly. It hasn’t been actually a year but, well it feels like I’ve gone through the seasons already. Meh. In a couple of weeks vacation’s going to be over. I’ve still got so much stuff to do, I’m not even operational yet. Stress. I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately either. I’m not entirely sure how to pull this all when school starts. That should be pretty… interesting.

Bittersweet

This is my grandmother. My father’s mother. We call her ‘Ama’, which is, if you were chinese, what you’d call your father’s mother. Anyway, Ama is 80 something years of age. Sadly, she’s starting to get a little forgetful. Its actually been a while now. In recent months when I’d be at her place for lunch, she’d ask me the same question 4 to 5 times over, forgetting that she’s already asked me. This of course saddens me. She’s getting forgetful, a sign of her inevitable ageing. A while ago while having lunch at her place for mother’s day, some of our cousins living and working abroad called in. It only hit me then how bad her being forgetful was when some aunts had to remind her who it was on the phone. It was about that time that I was told that she forgot such things as our (grandchildren) names already. But anyway, that’s only half the point of this entry. That’s the bitter part.

The sweet part is remembering my phone call to her the other day. A few days before, I called her up to invite her to go see the resort. Soon as she picks up the phone and I say ‘Hi Ama!’, she instantly recognizes my voice and says ‘Oliver! Ikaw ba yan?’ My cousins (who lived with her) were pretty surprised that she was able to identify my voice like that. That kinda made my day But still. There’s this reminder that she is, indeed, getting older…

Of Pools and Mud Trenches

When I was about 10 years old, give or take a year or two, I was doing the whole playing in the mud thing. Literally. I remember digging trenches, walling up the sides, even figuring out ways to reinforce the said walls and then, finally, grab the garden hose just to watch the water flow through my creation. Obviously, after a couple of minutes the whole thing would fall apart but hey, that only meant it was time to dig another trench system.

So, about 15 years on, I find myself in Binondo buying a 2-horsepower submersible pump. Why? Because I need a way to raise the water up from my shallow well and into my newly renovated pool. So there I was, with a hose that was apparently about 10 feet short of reaching the pool, looking to make a way for the water to reach the pool. I just had to laugh when I was reminded of what I was doing back when I was a kid. Its like doing the same thing, only on a bigger scale. Life’s funny that way I guess. Makes me think about what we’re all trying to do with out lives, that maybe we’ve always known how to live our lives since we were kids, that we just choose to complicate things, that things are more or less the same as before, maybe only on different scales.

And sooo… yeah. The pool’s done. I’ll post pictures on the Acacia Blog when I get back to Manila, lots of new things to see here. On a side note, I’m loving this moment right now. I’m on the bed writing this down, my brother, sister and Alegre are down in the pool having some drinks while Patti Austin sings to Tuck Andres through the IM7, heard over the entire resort. And the sky, and the sea, and… everything. I’m pretty excited about when we start operating.